Birthday

In the midst of all the ruckus, I forgot to write about my birthday. Elina gave me two nice presents, even though I felt like I was some geek or at least a nerd: I got the extended DVD box of Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings and a plush Cthulhu! Especially the latter is wonderful. Check him out here.

And this is also very nice: a phototale of a plush Cthulhu taking over!

Roger Buck Hill?

It seems I have a busy day at the blog office. Well, I have nothing to do and things I'd have to do I don't really feel like doing, such as take a shower and go to get some food...

I checked the copyright records for a Roger Hill at the US copyright website. It was stated there that the Roger Hill who wrote the three Knight Rider tie-in paperbacks in the eighties is the same Roger Hill who's been playing jazz saxophone for nearly fifty decades, under the alias Buck Hill. Can this be? How reliable these copyright records are? It seems pretty unbelievable or at least implausible that a jazz veteran would start writing pulp in his old days.

But here's his copyright records anyway:

ITEM 1. PAu-1-386-116: Jazz ballad / Roger "Buck" Hill. CLNA: Barney Music
ITEM 2. PAu-1-858-878: Mitzi. CLNA: Barney Music
ITEM 3. PAu-1-858-879: Lullaby of Loosdrecht. CLNA: Barney Music
ITEM 4. PAu-1-858-880: Blues in five for four or more. CLNA: Barney Music
ITEM 5. PAu-1-858-881: Bossa for sax. CLNA: Barney Music
ITEM 6. PAu-2-282-644: Griots groove / Buck Hill. CLNA: acBlack Entertainment Television ITEM 7. TX-1-249-952: Knight rider / Glen A. Larson and Roger Hill. CLNA: M C A Publishing, a division of M C A Communications, Inc.
ITEM 8. TX-1-295-156: Trust doesn't rust / Glen A. Larson and Roger Hill. CLNA: M C A Publishing, a division of M C A Communications, Inc.
ITEM 9. TX-1-344-337: Hearts of stone / Glen A. Larson and Roger Hill. CLNA: M C A Publishing, a division of M C A Communications, Inc.
ITEM 10. TX-1-376-245: Clear de road : a Virgin Islands history textbook / written by Roger Hill ; illustrated by El'Roy Simmonds. CLNA: Government of the United States Virgin Islands, Bureau of Libraries, Museums & Archaeological Services

The last one is a book and can be found on WorldCat through Abebooks.

Still on Finnish tie-ins

I wrote (in February) about tie-ins and said this:

"Finland has been pretty slow to produce its own novelizations. There are some, though. Katri Manninen who has later gained some fame for her fitness books started out writing books on the Salatut Elämät (Secret Lives) soap series. My pal Tapani Bagge wrote his first novel (after many pseudo- and anonymous paperbacks) on a TV series called Pelastajat (it's about fire men). But this was in the nineties and I can't think of any previous examples."

I should've mentioned the paperback Markku Selin published when his and his buddy Renny Harlin's first film, "Born American/Jäätävä polte" was out. The book was written by Hyeena Hämäläinen, who's a pretty prolific Finnish mystery writer (and former surf guitarist). The publisher was actually Kustannus 21, and the film is called "Arctic Heat". But clearly this was Selin's idea of publishing a real American-style tie-in paperback. I don't think the book sold very well, but would love to hear corrections.

Kustannus 21 published also humour column books by Jammu and Veikko Ennala.

The film, by the way, seems to stir up controversy and conflicting thoughts even now. Check out the IMDb comments site here. One of them says:

"This film makes me want to stay home and thank God every day that I live in such a wonderful country. Even the good guy turned out to be a bad guy in "Born American". Shook me to my foundations."

How to get a flat stomach in just one day

I've been translating, as I've noted here before, Jason Starr's excellent novel "Nothing Personal". One of the lead characters, Leslie Sussman, is having anorectic attacks and vomits everything she eats, telling everyone she's got some sort of virus. She loses weight and his husband, advertising prick called David Sussman, notices that Leslie is indeed looking better and thinks: maybe this virus is not such a bad thing after all. In the mean time he's having an affair from hell with a young woman called Amy Lee.

And, yes, I just found out that throwing everything up works miracles. I got, maybe from yoghurt I ate last Monday night, stomach complaint and threw up everything I ate. And we had to go to Helsinki to talk about our talkkuna book (it was the Day of Books and Roses and there was this huge book carneval). I said to Elina that I can't come. They left without me and after lying down a while I decided that I'll take the next train. Everything went alright, until I got back on the train. I vomited five times during the two-hour trip back to Turku (actually the first half of it). It was embarrassing to go to the toilet again and again, especially when the car was full of people. They must've been thinking I've got hangover.

Today I've been slightly better. Nothing has come up since the trip and I slept for at least ten hours, but I'm still weak and wouldn't want to do anything. (Except that I had to write down the results of my students' exams. It would've been boring even if had been healthy.) But I just noticed that I've now got a flat stomach. I just wonder what I have to do keep it that way...

Seriously, I can't imagine how anorectic people can throw up everything they eat. They must feel dizzy and drowsy all the time. And what their breath must be like... Maybe you get used to it. And what price awaits those who are patient! A flat stomach. Now, I can't really think of anything more important!

Isku # 2

The new issue of Isku came just out of printers last Wednesday and has hopefully reached at least some of the subscribers. It's an excellent issue, with a vintage story from 1960 by Seppo Tuisku, who has been a prominent figure in the Finnish pulp fiction from the late fifties on. He edited mags like Jerry Cotton and FinnWest and taught many writers the craft of fiction. One of them is Tapani Bagge, who also has a story in the new Isku. There's also a translation of a Molly Brown story - she's a rising author from Great Britain (although I just heard that she was born in the US).

Other writers are Petri Salin, Helena Numminen, Hannu Väisänen and me. Also the Isku stalwart Petri Hirvonen is there with a punching story from Chile in 1983! My story is a Joe Novak story, "The Case of the Walking Sticks". There isn't as much parody as in my other Novaks, it's a rather classical hardboiled PI story. This is maybe explained by the fact that the first draft was written in 1987! I remember scribbling it with a pen in a notebook. Even after several rewrites I wasn't sure whether it really would merit a publication, but then Tapani read it and said: go ahead. (If it turns out turgid after all, please don't accuse Tapani.)

So, this is my third short story in print!

Thanks also to Lotta for the excellent translation of Molly Brown's story!

Parties; Usual Suspects; August Derleth

We had a birthday party last night (I'll be 33 next Tuesday) and ended up having some 15 guests at our place. We had a wonderful time and had lots of booze and food (I made excellent warm noodle salad with plenty of hot curry sauce and sweet chili in it) and I even ended up dancing wildly to the sounds of raw nothern soul at the local club with Niko-Matti. There were some British DJ's visiting and they made the place rock. Or rather, funk.

Of course the morning wasn't so deligthful. Elina now has spent her first Mother's Day in a hangover!

***

I wrote earlier about Christopher McQuarrie's disappointing "Way of the Gun". I watched "Usual Suspects", Bryan Singer's tour de force film, last Friday night. I couldn't help thinking that it must be Singer who made the picture click. (With of course the actors. Excellent team work from everyone. And there's no sign of Tarantino-like showing off with one's actors: the men in Singer's film are almost nameless and faceless, yet very efficient and very much there, with a commanding presence.) McQuarrie wasn't able to deliver the goods alone, as "Way of the Gun" demonstrates.

I just wonder what went wrong with Singer. The Stephen King film "Apt Pupil" is confused at best and I just can't get myself interested in his X-Men films (that's partly due to the fact that I'm not very much into super heroes). I was wondering if it has something to do with the realization that you can't make a successful career in the New Hollywood with small-scale crime pictures, such as "Usual Suspects". I think the same happened with Tarantino. I wish he'd continued in the line of "Reservoir Dogs" and "Jackie Brown", but instead he made a pastiche party of cliches with "Kill Bill" (whose first part I just detested) and is going to redo a seventies Italian war film. And same has happened with other directors: John Dahl, whose attempts at SF were a disaster, Gary Fleder, who jumped to big serial killer movies...

There are some directors who don't seem to want to leave the genre, such as James Gray, whose "Little Odessa" was one of the best Hollywood films of the nineties. But he has almost faded to oblivion and obscurity after that. I have yet to see his "The Yards" (hey, Tapani, where's the tape?), but I don't think he'll rise again. I'll keep my fingers crossed, though.

There's also George Hickenlooper, whose films I've heard being praised, but whose "Persons Unknown" I saw with Joe Mantegna and Naomi Watts was rather messy, with the actors not really looking what they were supposed to look like (i.e. a drunk policeman or drug fiends). I don't really know what John McNaughton is doing at the moment, but his "Wild Things" is underrated, very fifties, very paperback original like film. And his "Normal Life" from 1996 went unnoticed by almost everyone even though it was an excellent little crime flick.

***

I was writing an entry for August Derleth, the horror and regional writer and the founder of Arkham House. When he was 30, he had already published sixteen books and tons of short stories in the pulps. Here I'm at almost 33 and have published eight books and three short stories.

Which, by the way, reminds me of the new issue of Isku that came out of the presses couple days back. I'll have to write about that later on.

Alien Resurrection

I said I'd write something about "Alien Resurrection", the fourth film in the Alien cycle, directed by the French Jean-Pierre Jeunet. I liked all the previous Alien films, even the James Cameron one, who gets usually dismissed by serious critics. David Fincher's Alien3 was, almost through the film, also an original piece of work. But the Jeunet film - what can I say? There are some nice moments. One that sticks in the mind is the one where aliens swim. It's a moment of true horror. The plot demise was original, at least for a Hollywood science fiction.

But the end of the film was awful. Stupid. Hilariously bad. There's a new generation of aliens, born out of the *womb* of the queen mother that has been bred with some genetic help from Lt. Ripley. And the f***ing new monster looks just ugly, a mix of a human skull and alien's neck bones. It dies in a very stupid and implausible way. The original aliens are very beautiful creations in comparison. You can see H.R. Giger was nowhere near the sets.

There's also a ridiculous scene in which Ripley, now the mother, meets her new-born baby. It recognizes her immediately. They start to touch each other. This is supposed to be a touching scene, mother and baby and all that. But it seems that their mutual touches are erotic, not the ones with which mother caresses her baby. This makes the confused movie look even more confused about its attitude towards sexuality and motherhood (themes that the feminist critics say are at the core of the all Alien films; well, maybe not "Alien vs. Predator").

Jeunet had made earlier some nice odd-ball pictures like "Delicatessen" that are full of gimmicks and black humour. I haven't seen them since they were in premiere, so I can't really give an objective (or a very good subjective) review of those. But to be honest, I hated "Amelie" that made him famous. It was supposed to wonderful fairy-tale of Paris and lovers and a loving pastice of old French films, but I thought it was neurotic and very absorbing, and not in a good sense. I couldn't understand why everyone said the film made them feel good. How come? The bitch in the lead only harassed other people.

***

I promised to say a word about Christopher McQuarrie's "Way of the Gun". Now, there's a promising project: a Peckinpahesque, hardboiled crime film about two losers kidnapping a young woman who's having a child for the rich couple who can't have their own. McQuarrie scripted "Usual Suspects" for Bryan Singer, the film I very much liked. But, no, no way. I don't think I will bother to check the whole film. I watched some twenty minutes of if after "Alien Resurrection", but had to give up. I didn't for a moment realize what the guys were actually doing and why. They were just louse-ups and that's that. No background, no explanation or motives for their action. In the post-Tarantino world, the film makers seem too easily to forget the rules of the classical cinema: always tell what the people are after.

(I know: it's the rule that the European new-wavers sought out to destroy, but then again there was a political agenda behind that and all the Brecht-derived theory about the alienating effect. It doesn't really seem to be the case with Mr. McQuarrie here.)

I asked my friend why I keep watching these films. Why don't I watch Anthony Mann, Yasujiro Ozu, Vsevolod Pudovkin..? Why torment myself? My friend didn't really know the answer.

Another poem (in Finnish)

I wrote one or two poems this morning, too, and the first of them turned out pretty fine.

Käsitteistö ei ole selvä:
linnut ovat vielä valtaamatta,
pesimäpaikat ovat spektaakkeli,
yhteiskunta vaatii meiltä sen mitä emme voi antaa,
itsemme, minämme, sen mikä meissä on meitä,
varjot laskeutuvat hitaasti,
se oli mennyttä kesää,
silloin en voinut vielä tietää mikä olisi osani tulevaisuudessa,
tiedänkö sen nyt,

kysyn sitä sinulta,
koska oletan että tiedät,
minut on siitetty drive-in –teatterin valossa
elokuvien keskellä,
huonojen sellaisten,

se on ulkomaiden taikaa,
Suomessa ei ole perinteisesti ollut drive-in –teattereita,
andalusialainen koira ja sen sellaiset,
mrs. miniver ja hänen kaikki tuskansa,
kuka sen läpäisee, kuka sen voi voittaa,
kaadettuamme meidän on jälleen nostettava,
mitä,
lelut tietysti,
pienet muoviset numerot ja työkalut.

Tomorrow I'll say something about "Alien Resurrection" and "Way of the Gun" by Christopher McQuarrie.

Back from the universities

I bet everyone was bored reading my rant about universities. Let's get back to the Real World. My job and my writing are much more interesting issues... (Nah, just kidding.)

Kauto woke us up at six. Elina stayed in bed, but I rose and ate breakfast and Kauto played for an hour and then he went back to sleep. (They slept up till 9.30.) I cannot go back to sleep when I'm already awake and had breakfast, so I opened the computer and went to work. It turned out to be a pretty productive day. I finished a self-assigned typing job (more about that later: it's a business secret) and translated over five pages of Jason Starr's "Nothing Personal". Let me tell you: it's a great novel. One of the Great American Novels of the 1990's. I certainly hope that my translation will find a home. If not, I'll publish it myself. Then I dabbled with "The Dostoyevsky Reel". There was a ill-written scene with which I tampered for quite a while. I'm not very good at writing scenes with much happening and going on, people going in, sitting down, putting things into motion. But I hope it got better.

I also made a research on the fourties and fifties B films because the scene was situated in a drive-in. There's a double bill with Devil Bat's Daughter and The Magnetic Monster. My book takes place in 1957, so these are pretty old films, but then again the drive-in is a shabby place where there are no premieres (with the exception of the ones that the bad guy in the book produces). I've tried to base all the films mentioned in the ms. in reality, so that they really exist.

But this research took time, as I dwelved into the mysteries of IMDb. It's a fascinating world, the universe of forgotten B films and their makers. Who are they? Did they really care about the art, the cinema, misé-en-scene? It's also quite sad to read about people like Frank Wisbar who made only lousy B pictures after emigrating from Germany in the thirties. (Well, I know that some people are enthusiastic about this. I haven't seen it myself.)

Then I edited some texts for the forth-coming horror reference book (Diane Guest, Peter Straub and James Herbert) and sent them to Jukkahoo. Then I read my e-mail and then I wrote an interview with Vicki Hendricks, the queen of noir (or noirotica, since there are many erotic elements in her novels). At the moment I should be doing finishing touches on the female noir article I've been doing.

I also wrote poetry. I did it first thing in the morning. I've been writing poems on and off for some seven or eight years now, while earlier I wrote so many that I even published my own poetry mag, Blinkity Blank (1988-1997).

Here are the results (in Finnish, I'll try to translate one of them into English):

Kadulla tulevat vastaan
hiljaiset liituraidat,
poikittaiset sanat,
meille on varattu taivaspaikka
kuka minnekin,
minä menen yhdeksännelle piirille,
se on ansaitsemani rangaistus,
kuka tietää, mihin itse kuuluu,
paikat on varattu jo vuosia etukäteen,
ellei vuosituhansia.
Se on meemien valta,
se on yhteiskunnan tahto,
kuka astuu ovesta sisään,
kuka jää kynnykselle,
meidän ei kannata sanoa vastaan,
liituraitojen sanoma.

***

Lintu askeltaa minun kirjainteni ylitse:
se on tämän ajan vaade,
kirjeitse ilmoitettu ajatuksen katko,
valheelliset uutisoinnit
asioista jotka eivät ole ikinä tapahtuneet
eivätkä tapahdu,
eivätkä tule tapahtumaan,
kuka tämän tietää,
ilmoittautukoon.

***

Tai vaietkoon iäksi:
se on tuntuma yhteiskuntaan.

***

Onko jollakulla vielä mahdollisuus
olla kadonnut, kadonnut löytyi kuolleena,
kieli vai ajatukset,
kumpi tulee ensin,
minä varaan mahdollisuuden erehtyä.

***

Hiljaiset liituraidat,
pakottakaa meidät ansaitsemaan,
saakaa meidät puhumaan,
itsemme pussiin, itseni ansaan:
tähän kieleen ovat muutkin langenneet.

***

Väkisin ansaittua rahaa,
leijailkaa kaduilla vastaan,
tuokaa meille ansaitsemamme skonssit:
jälkiruokien aatelit,
kuka vielä muistaa vuosien takaiset juhlat,
kuka vielä voi muistaa miltä tuntui olla osa yhteiskuntaa,
kuka vielä tietää, kuka voi tietää:
tästä on mentävä, ali tai yli,
ympäri käyden kohtaa oman turmionsa,
katsoo sitä suoraan silmistä sisään,
astuu sisään ikiomaan tuhoonsa,
vanhat autokauppojen interiöörit,
muinaiset sotilaiden univormut,
uudet, käsittelyaineelta haisevat ihmiset,
meille ei ole löytynyt tilaa enää vuosiin.

***

Now in English:

A bird steps over my letters:
it's a prerequisite for this age,
letterized rapture in thoughts,
unreliable news about things that have never taken place,
that don't take place,
that will never take place,
who knows anything about this,
come forward.

(Transl. by JN)

Rave about the universities (in Finnish)

This is in Finnish, because I really can't write it in English and probably wouldn't interest anyone outside Finland. It's about the role of universities in Finland.

Suomen itsenäisyyden juhlarahasto eli SITRA julkisti toissapäivänä raportin, jonka mukaan Suomen yliopistojen pitäisi muuttua maksullisiksi. Tämä muun muassa sen takia, että kaikki muutkin tekevät niin (mikä on aina hyvä argumentti, muistuttaa hiukan leikki-ikäisten touhuja), mutta myös sen takia, että innovaattorit eivät häipyisi tästä maasta tekemään innovaatioitaan muihin maihin.

Aivan käsittämätöntä ajattelua! Ilmeisesti Sitrassa kenellekään ei ole tullut mieleen, että yliopistoissa tehdään muutakin kuin teknisiä innovaatioita, joilla voi nostaa kansantaloutta ja joiden takia voi sanoa valtiolle, että veroja pitää pienentää, jotta saamme enemmän fyrkkaa keksinnöistämme. Suurin osa yliopistojen tuottamista tutkimustuloksista on jotain aivan muuta. Mitä tekemistä jollain sosiologian aivan perustutkimuksilla on teknologisten innovaatioiden kanssa? Puhumattakaan jostain filosofiasta tai kirjallisuudentutkimuksesta (josta olen itse valmistunut). Yliopistot tuottavat itseymmärrystä eikä sellaiseen tähtäävää tutkimusta mennä tekemään ulkomaille, joissa olisi Sitran edustaman ajattelun mukaan parempia yliopistoja tai innovatiivisempaa meininkiä. Itseymmärrystä tehdään parhaiten hitaasti ja sinnikkäästi tutkimalla eikä menemällä päiväperhomaisten innovaatioiden perässä, niin kuin Sitra ilmeisesti haluaa.

Sitran kuva humanistisesta tai yhteiskuntatieteellisestä tutkimuksesta on nähtävästi syntynyt sen perusteella, että aina välillä näistä tieteistä nousee esiin - lähinnä vain hetkeksi - julkkiksia, jotka ovat alansa johtavia asiantuntijoita. Mutta Sitran ja muiden pölvästien päähän ei mahdu se, että nämäkään tutkijat (esim. Jaakko Hämeen-Anttila) eivät ole lähteneet tekemään innovaatioita, vaan perustutkimusta, jonka päälle he ovat voineet ja saaneet rauhassa tehdä pidemmälle meneviä tutkimuksia.

Sanoin Kautolle, kun luin uutista Hesarista, että valtaapitävät eivät halua tukea itseymmärrystä. Ehkä he tajuavat sen verran, että se on heille itselleen vaarallista.

Elinalle sanoin, että en tiedä, mitä teemme, jos Kautosta ei tule huippuälykästä tyyppiä, joka pääsee yliopistoon jonkin Nokia-säätiön stipendillä. Jos tulomme eivät tästä merkittävästi kasva (enkä näe syytä, että ne kasvaisivat), niin millä ihmeellä me kustannamme pojan opiskelun? Sitralaiset haluavat ilmeisesti estää tavallisen fiksujen perustyyppien korkeakouluopiskelun. Kaikki vain huipuille! Masentavaa läskipäistä ajattelua.

Tähän liittyy muuten myös se minua viime aikoina masentanut trendi, jonka toivottavasti kaikki muutkin ovat huomanneet: antihumanismin lisääntyminen ja median paijailu niitä kohtaan, jotka haukkuvat humanismia ja humanisteja. Äänekkäimmät humanismin vastustajat ovat rasittavan ylimieliset Kari Enqvist ja Esko Valtaoja. Varsinkin viimeksimainittua kavahdan pahan kerran. Onneksi Sami Pihlström pisteli Valtaojan uutta teknologiauskoista ja filosofiavihamielistä kirjaa ankarasti uusimmassa Tieteessä tapahtuu -lehdessä - mitä ei paljon tapahdu, siis että Valtaojaa kritisoitaisiin julkisesti. Ehkä Pihlströmin teksti löytyy netistä, jos ei, menkää kirjastoon.

Enqvist ja Valtaoja saavat mediassa niin paljon palstatilaa kuin vain haluavat. Nokian "menestystarina" on näköjään johtanut siihen, että vain teknologia on tärkeätä. Muu on turhaa ja hidastaa rikkaiden typerysten rikastumista.

Humanismin vastustajista median paijaama on muuten myös Pentti Linkola, joka hänkin edustaa kovia tieteitä (hänhän on lintutieteilijä eli biologi). Hänet erottaa edellämainituista sentään se, että hän kirjoittaa hyvin. Valtaojan nokkeluudet voi minusta huoletta jättää omaan arvoonsa.

Viggo Mortensen

I admitted in my previous post having been crushed on Viggo Mortensen. (I answered wrong, I realize that now, since the question was about the fictional characters, not actors. And in the books, you moron, in the books! Not films!)

But I do remember vividly that I was fascinated by his bad teeth and grinding voice when I saw Renny Harlin's first American feature, "Prison". It doesn't have a very good reputation, I know, but I thought it was pretty well-handled piece of horror. (And I just might say that it's best Renny, the man from Finland (originally Lauri Harjola), has done. With the exception of "Long Kiss Goodnight", even it has some implausibilities.)

Viggo was very good also in "Indian Runner", a nice drama film directed by Sean Penn. And in "Reflecting Skin" by Philip Ridley (I haven't seen the latter again, BTW: does it hold up? I remember comparing it even with the films of Charles Chaplin in the review I wrote at the time!).

And then Viggo disappeared (at least, for me). Then he resurfaced in the Stallone flick where the former Rocky saves people from the tunnels (forgot the title). Viggo had had his teeth fixed and he had obviously seen some speech coach, since the grind had disappeared from his voice (well, not altogether, of course). He's very good in LoTR, but not very hot. And he was HOT in "Prison" and all the other films. I was ready to nominate him the sexiest male actor in the world (to make sure: I didn't write that kind of reviews). The tunnel film was a big let-down, I'm sorry to say.

I also mentioned Elizabeth Shue. I fell in love with her in "Leaving Las Vegas" (not Goodbye, as I wrote earlier), but she hasn't given me such thrills second time. She was very, very good-looking in "Palmetto" (by the German new-waver, Volker Schlöndorff), but not near the Las Vegas film.

Maybe that's what always happens. Love at first sight should be left at that.

pHinnWeb's blog

I should've posted the book questionnaire to Mr. pHinn who maintains a very nice blog here. His blog is an interesting mix of electro underground culture in Finland and abroad, some anxiety of his own and very nice takes on mysticism and stuff like that (James Lovelock, Jorge Luis Borges, pagan origins of Easter etc. etc.). Check it out. When I'll start my own publishing company, Verikoirakirjat/Blood Hound Press, I will put out pHinn's long essay on Charles Manson and the aftermaths of the hippie culture.

Book questions

I got his from Tero.

Book Questionnaire

You’re stuck inside Fahrenheit 451. Which book do you want to be?

The Communist Manifesto. After reading the book the rebels would really know what to do instead of trying feebly to memorize the books. A bloody revolution is all they need!

Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character?

Are idolizations called crushes? Maybe Bob Morane, when I was a kid. I hoped I was more like him (which was none). Maybe some movies, with some pretty babes (Elizabeth Shue in "Goodbye Las Vegas"). And Viggo Mortensen, whom I considered for long to be very hot.

What are you currently reading?

Charlotte Armstrong's "A Dram of Poison" from 1956. It's for an article about female noir. There are some other books lying on the night table, but let's leave them out, since I haven't really touched them for a while. In the WC, there's a copy of Adam Hardy's (= Ken Bulmer) George Abercrombie Fox paperback (about Napoleon wars fought on sea: strictly pulp). I'm on page 25 or so.

Five books you would take to a deserted island?

The Lord of the Rings
The Selected Letters of Raymond Chandler
Robinson Crusoe by Daniel Defoe
Yrjö Hirn's study of robinsonades, "Valtameren saari/The Sea in the Ocean" (1922; with a good bibliography on the subject)
My forth-coming book on Finnish pulp fiction (presumed it's ready when I'm in a shipwreck and find myself marooned)

Can I also mention Al Hubin's The Bibliography of Crime Fiction? On the CD side, maybe Pat Hawk's pseudonyms catalogue would be really nice. Provided I had a computer with me.

Now, that makes seven.

Who are you going to pass this stick to (3 persons) and why?

Oh god.. let me think. I don't know so many bloggers. James , Tosikko and Bill. James and Bill write about books and Tosikko is a dear friend.

Back to safer areas from the universe of role playing books...

I finished Dorothy Hughes's "Ride the Pink Horse" (1946) last night. It was relaxing to open up a bottle of French cider and sit down and read a book after everyone else had gone to sleep. I liked the book much more than I would've thought since I had to drop it last time I tried it. There was some overwriting and over-analyzing (especially in the end scenes in which the policeman MacIntyre starts to moralize - that could easily be left out), but the overall effect was very good and very nice in its grimness. The ending was quite nasty, even though Sailor manages to escape.

I liked this more than "In Lonely Place" which I read earlier last week. It was more over-written and with some empty scenes throughout the book. But maybe the emptiness was the whole point: there's nothing left in the world that has just gone through the World War.

I didn't like much Hughes's last novel, "The Expendable Man" (1963) which was her last and which I read in January or February. It started out promising enough when it seemed almost absurd and Kafkaesque, but then Hughes gives the point away and the book becomes a rather moralizing and predictable tale on racial prejudice.

There are two other books by Hughes in Finnish, but I trust Tapani when he says that they are not interesting. The other is her debut novel, "The So Blue Marble" and the other one, oh well, even I can't check all the things.

Interesting, though (or sad or embarrassing actually), is that the two novels I mentioned first were turned into famous films ("In Lonely Place" with Bogie being more famous than "Ride the Pink Horse" which was directed by Robert Montgomery who had just earlied trashed Chandler's "Lady in the Lake" with his camera-as-character narration) and I haven't seen either of them!

By the way, I think it's the script writer Steve Fisher who invented the idea of doing "Lady in the Lake" with camera as Marlowe. It just doesn't work and it's no wonder there aren't many feature-length films with the same idea. There are some nice moments, but it becomes irritating when you have to listen to Montgomery in voice-over all the time. Someone should be able think of the way of doing this without having to resort to voice-over. I don't know if it's possible. There are some nice films with voice-overs, but for example Kubrick's "The Killing" would be even better if there were no voice-over. The other example of camera-as-character narration is Delmer Daves's "Dark Passage" from a David Goodis novel, but it's only the first 20 minutes and hence won't get irritating.

An oddment to the previous post

After I'd written my earlier post, I'd remembered that I had tracked down a slight connection between the world of fan fiction and role playing game books (isn't that thrilling!). I had written an article about the heroes of Edgar Rice Burroughs written by other writers, with or without the consent of Burroughs's heirs, and noticed that one of them had later produced role playing game books.

So (ta-daa!) let me present you: the bibliography of Ken St. Andre:

ROLE PLAYING GAME BOOKS:

Tunnels and Trolls: The Amulet of the Salkti and Arena of Khazan
With David Steven Moskowitz. Illustrated by Josh Kirby. UK: Corgi, 1986.

Tunnels and Trolls: Naked Doom.
Illustrated by Talbot, James, Carver, Robin; Crompton, Steven. Scottsdale, AZ, U.S.A.: Flying Buffalo Incorporated, 1977.

Tunnels and Trolls: Deathtrap Equalizer
Illustrated by Danforth, Elizabeth; Talbot, James. Scottsdale, AZ, U.S.A.: Flying Buffalo Incorporated, 1977.

Tunnels and Trolls: Arena of Khazan.
Illustrated by Day, Gene; Laird, Peter. Scottsdale, AZ, U.S.A.: Flying Buffalo Computer-Conflict Simulation, Incorporated, 1979.

Stormbringer: Fantasy Role-Playing in the Young Kingdoms. Chaosium Inc. 1981. (Illustrated by Frank Brunner).

Stormbringer Companion.
With Sandy Petersen, Steve Perrin, Lynn Willis. Chaosium 1983.

Stormbringer: Fantasy Roleplaying in the World of Elric.
With Perrin, Steve; Monroe, John B. (editor), Whelan, Michael (illustrator); Brunner, Frank (illustrator). Hayward, CA, U.S.A.: Chaosium, Incorporated, 1990.

SHORT STORIES:

”Korak and the Killer Leopard”, Odwar 1964 (ERB fanzine).

(Erm.. actually it seems (I did the google search only now on Ken St. Andre) that he's written much more and designed games. But I'll have to leave it at that and hope that someone else will continue my research on this. His own website is here.)

Tolkien spin-offs

I wrote about Tolkien in my last post here and got to thinking about - what else (this guy is predictable!) than tie-ins and spin-offs? There seem to be no Tolkien spin-offs, with the exception of some role game books. Or that's what I thought at first.

As for the Tolkien role game books, I bought one at the children's library sale. It was only out of curiosity, since I've always thought that role playing is a waste of time (hey, c'mon guys, you could write about tie-ins in your blog! come out of that forest and take off your stupid helmets!). The book is called, hm, I can't find the actual title anywhere. It's perhaps "Darkest of the Dark/Thieves and Crookes" or something like that (hey, this is a double book!).

The book was designed by Margaret and Dan Henley and Matthias and Karen Brinker, whoever they are. The first story/game is set in Briimaa (what's it in English?), east of Shire, and the lead characters are men. This is pretty difficult to read if you don't want to play.

It seems that there was a role game already on the LoTR itself. Which I didn't originally know.

Heck, I don't know anything about this genre! I only wanted to say, with a slight wonder upon my face, that no one was assigned to write an abridgement of LoTR after the Jackson film. It would've sold millions. (At least I think so. Maybe that's why I wouldn't be a successful publisher.) There were some how-the-film-was-made books and some such. And where are the spin-offs? I can see the trilogy "The Further Adventures of Merri and Pippin", or "What Gandalf Did Before Getting Acquainted with Bilbo Baggins", or "Saruman the White and the Gold of Opar". Don't you the see possibilities?!

But then I got to thinking that Tolkien did the spin-offs himself. There have been dozens of collections of unfinished stories by him, even one with Sauron rising from the shadows (scary thought, that one). But then again, why doesn't someone finish his stories? They would make some serious money. I mean, millions and billions of dollars. Isn't anyone listening?

And at the same time, someone's writing these stories without getting paid. I'm talking about Tolkien fan fiction. Just check out this one. It's actually an enormous industry!

Hey, this one sounds like a pulp story: "Chingo, Princess of Mirkwood."

***

Kauto is almost talking. He's on the brink of realizing how to make meaningful sounds. He knows - we are both sure about this - what "kukka/flower" and "lintu/bird" are since he can point them out in the tapestry we have in the bedroom. I've been repeating the words for him ever since he was two weeks old.

He also says "hi"! He lifts his (usually right) hand and shouts something like: "Jjoi!" He does this even to strangers.

Time to go. Have a nice weekend! We are off to my friend Markku's dissertation party. Markku did his enormous dissertation about Norman Mailer's fan fiction - oops, spin-offs! no, it was about his tie-ins.. hmm, maybe I should go to sleep. It's about Mailer's non-fiction and it's very interesting. The book is available here. Check it out!

(Is there Norman Mailer fan fiction? The sequel to "The Naked and the Dead", written by Neena79?)

Bicycles; Tolkien

I've now finally become a city person.

I was a bit busy today and all things seemed hazy. I had to go here and there and attend a meeting or two. I was leaving home to attend the businesses and had a thought: maybe I should take out my bicycle. I hadn't been cycling since I put the bicycle away for Winter (of course at the gym, but that's not the same thing). I could make the trip twice as fast as walking.

But the idea wore me out. I got to thinking that I'd arrive breathing heavily, hot, sweaty, tired, face all red. No no. That's not me.

And I decided to walk. It turned out to be a good idea, since I had just plenty of time (well, I skipped one of the meetings, which made some two good hours more).

But it was somewhat odd to me: why didn't I want to ride a bike? I was once a heavy supporter of cycling. We even had great ideas of becoming great bicycle cultivators, my friend Arttu and I. At one point we had some 30 vintage bicycles (well, some of them were so called projects, with parts missing and all). I ride an old bicycle even now, but I no longer think of collecting them. I even hate messing with the brakes and tyres and stuff - instead I'm thinking of getting the damn junk to the real repairman. I don't want to get my hands on grease.

And this is why I'm now finally a city person. Walking is what one does in the city, not riding a bike and not driving a car. Well, maybe buses and trolleys are for city persons, too, but if one wants to be cheap, one walks. (And there are no trolleys in Turku. Or subways.)

***

I watched Ralph Bakshi's animated version of Tolkien's "Lord of the Rings" (1979) the other night. It was a very disappointing experience, even though my memory of it wasn't very good in the first place. I had seen the film some 15-16 years back and hadn't liked it, but I liked it even less now. It was clear that Bakshi's backers had lost their faith during the filming process and everything gets more hasty when the end approaches. It was badly narrated, badly edited, odd-looking film that felt like no one really knew what it really should be. Someone (maybe Bakshi) felt it should be very artsy (just look at those colours and lines and odd shapes in the scenes with the ring wraiths), but someone also felt it should be very easy to look at and cutesy (Frodo Baggins especially with his large eyes and cuddly hair which make him almost ghastly).

And why on Earth did they use the technique of photographing the men first and then drawing on them and colouring them, when it was used only on orchs (and some men and elves when they are running)? Why isn't on all the time? And why are there so few orchs? It looks like they are having some sort of gang war, not the War of the Ring!

A friend said that Bakshi's version is better than Peter Jackson's hyperdrive version. I couldn't agree less. Bakshi's version is maybe more artful, but Jackson at least brings the happenings and the people to life. And it's entertaining, while Bakshi is almost torture.

Well, two points for trying. If it was another book, I'd give it only one (or one and a half).

I remember reading that Bernardo Bertolucci and Stanley Kubrick also dreamt of filming "The Lord of the Rings". Is this true? Or am I mixing this with something else? (Did they plan to film Hammett's "Red Harvest" and I was reading about this at the same time when I was reading about the film versions of Tolkien?) Certainly John Boorman meant to film Tolkien, but instead he made "Excalibur". He would've been better at drama of Tolkien than Jackson, who is more at home with action. (Action Jackson!)

Well, it seems it's time to go to bed...

Midwood Doubles

I was right about Midwood having done doubles. Here's an incomplete list of what they did in the sixties - these are all cheap sleaze, i.e. sex, paperbacks and maybe not very intriguing. There's more than this - Abebooks shows six whole pages for this! There were perhaps other sex doubles. Only my fearless research will tell.

The Other Woman - the Quiet Type - A Midwood Double Novel #34-696
Corgan, Grant ; Henry, Mike
Book Description: NY: Midwood, 1966. Mass Market Paperback.

THE ADDED ATTRACTION & CAUGHT IN THE ACT
STANTON & HAMLAND
Book Description: midwood double, (ORIGINAL 1967),

Peeping Tom / Temptation
West, Virginia / James, Tammy
Book Description: New York: Midwood, 1967.

WIVES PLAY TOO / NEW WOMAN AROUND
Malloy, Dirk / Cassel, Lucas J.
Book Description: Canada: Midwood Double 34-723, 1966.

THESE WARM NIGHTS and ALL THE TRIMMINGS
BALMER & GREGORY
Book Description: midwood double, (ORIGINAL 1966), ed. 34-710,good sex adventure novel,

COMING OF AGE and HANDLE WITH CARE
KRAMER & BROOKS
Book Description: midwood double, (ORIGINAL 1965), ed. 34-532,

Bundle of Joy & Girls on the Loose
Norman A King & Linda Michaels
Book Description: A Midwood Double Novel, 1966. Paperback.

Black Satin//White Thighs
Nortic, Max//Conroy, Jim
Book Description: New York: Midwood Book, 1969. Paperback.

Two-Timer (Bound with Frank Harris--Mate Exchange.)
Nelson, Connie (Bound with Frank Harris.)Book Description: Midwood. [34-476] 1965. (Double paperback)

Easy Come, Easy Go
(Bound with Joseph Tell--from Bed to Worse.)
Nelson, Connie (Bound with Joseph Tell.)
Book Description: Midwood. [34-583] 1966. (Double paperback)

Swinging Secretary
Henry, Mike
Book Description: New York: Midwood Enterprises, 1967. Paperback.Very Good. First Edition. Midwood Double Novel, bound with"Office Party" by Connie Nelson.

ANGEL FACE and HOUSE PET
BROOKS & BALMER
Book Description: midwood double, (ORIGINAL 1966), ed. 34-581,

ONE LONG WEEKEND and FREE FOR ALL
LANSING & HOLBROOK
Book Description: midwood double, (ORIGINAL 1966), ed. 34-647,vg,

CALL ME KITTEN and FAIR EXCHANGE
MALLORD & ROOTE
Book Description: midwood double, (ORIGINAL 1966), ed. 34-637,vg, sex adventure novel,

SUBURBAN FLING and SOPHISTICATED PARTY
CONROY & DENBY
Book Description: midwood double, (ORIGINAL 1966), ed. 34-740,

WIVES PLAY TOO and NEW WOMAN AROUND
MALLOY & CASSELBook Description: midwood double, (ORIGINAL 1966), ed. 34-723,

Sugar And Space
Ellis, Joan
Book Description: Midwood Double 34-562 1965. (b/w: Not SoInnocent by William Moore).

Southern Belle//Teen-Age Mischief
Comstock, J. C.//Terry Shaffer
Book Description: New York: Midwood Book, 1966. Paperback. VeryGood. First Edition. 34-739. A Midwood double novel.

The Sex Game//Young and Hot
Scott, Arjay//Phillips, AryBook Description: New York: Midwood Book, 1968. Paperback.Midwood Double Novel.

One Too many/ Stay Until Morning
John Balmer/ Cynthia Sydney
Book Description: NY: A Midwood Book, 1966. Soft Cover. MassMarket Paperback. (A Midwood Double Novel - # 34-649 FirstPrinting Anywhere.)

LADY OF LEISURE and NEVER LET ME GO
NELSON & STEVENS
Book Description: midwood double, (ORIGINAL 1965),

French Leave/ Night Games
King, Norman anderson/ Dana Pitman
Book Description: Canada: MIdwood 34-784, 1967. a Midwood double.

SMALL TOWN SINNER AND THRILL HUNGRY.
Woods, Merry and Brian O'Bannon.Book Description: Midwood, 34-477 1965. Vintage erotic paperback.Double edition.

Shadow Dance / After Hours
Brooks, Barbara / McAndrews, Robbie
Book Description: New York: Midwood # S300 1st Edition 1963. A Midwood Double.

Executive Sweet / The Soft Sell
Ellis, Joan / Nelson, Connie
Book Description: NY: Midwood, 1965. Midwood Double 34-457.

A Girl a Night / Sex and Me
Reading, Mark and Harmon, Lee
Book Description: New York: Midwood Book, 1969. 2 complete novels, first edition.

Double books

I mentioned the so-called Ace Doubles in my previous message and started to think about the whole "invention". The Ace Doubles had two front covers and two novels - hence you could get two books at the same price and decide afterwards which one you want to read. I don't really know if it's a good idea - all the Ace Doubles I've seen have too small a font and the marginals are too narrow. And if it was a good idea, I think it would've been more popular with other paperback houses.

I don't know if there were any other publishers doing Doubles. I think I've seen (in the net) some sleaze/sex paperback Doubles, from cheapo houses like Midwood, but I'm not sure. Gryphon Books has done some Doubles, but I think they are pamphlet-sized, with 40-60 pages.

This never caught on in Finland. I don't know why. There were some reprint doubles, but no original novels published thus. And I don't think I've ever seen an original Finnish paperback double. There were some "triples", but they had only one cover (it would be hard to imagine what it would be like if all the books had their own front cover! Stephen Hawking might be able to figure it out). The Finnish Doubles and Triples were mainly Westerns (Walt Slades and such) or Hank Jasons.

So, well, maybe when and if and possibly and perhaps my idea for Blood Hound Press ever becomes true, it could be possible that I might think of doing some paperback doubles. Emphasis on "maybe". It could be fun, you know.

Backlash

A new entry in our on-going series "Confessions of a Non-Fiction Writer": another publisher just announced they are not interested in the book Elina and I proposed for them, about the Finnish pasta culture (actually "macaroni", but I don't actually know what precise meaning that word has in English). I tried not to smash the windows for couple of seconds, then I sent the memo we made to another publisher.

The Finnish pasta culture is very much its own and has nothing to do with the original Italian pasta (or Chinese noodles). The Finnish macaroni is short and doesn't always contain durum wheat at all and there are recipes that go like this:

Cook macaronis for half an hour. Cool them and leave them be. Cut them in thick slices and dip them in eggs and roll them over in wheat flour. Fry them on a pan.

It's called "macaroni steaks" and is to be eaten with meat. I don't know if anyone really does this anymore, since we've been taught to eat "real" Italian pasta with tomato sauce and garlic and herbs and stuff like that (and I do think that it tastes better), but this is cultural history that should be preserved.

We've heard some new recipes, though, that have nothing do with "pasta". One guy was reported eating his macaronis with liver pate: he just minced the liver pate in with the cooked macaroni.

***

I gave my usual Wednesday lecture on cinema history yesterday at the Tampere university. Elina and Kauto met me afterwards at the railway station and we went to see a new-born son of my old friend Arttu. It was so small and fragile! It's difficult to think that Kauto was once so small, as he walks (well, almost) and talks (well, almost).

We walked over the beautiful Pyynikinharju in the way to town and dropped by some second hand stores and flea markets. Nothing spectacular, but it's always entertaining to go through some musty old piles.

As for my lecture: I talked about the animated movies. I mentioned that I just might deliver a whole series of lectures about animations and one guy came up and said that he would be interested. Now, just go to work! I've been playing with the idea of doing a short book on the subject, since the last history of animated movies in Finnish is, what, almost thirty years old.

***

I went through today the rest of my first novel (well, that's what I like to think). It's called "The Blood Orgy of the Void God" and it's a genre hybrid of hardboiled police procedural, splatter horror and religious fantasy and satire. I don't know if it works. Some small publishers have been mildly interested in it (the other one went down, though), but I have a vague feeling that time has passed this kind of work. (I'd be almost willing to give it away free, but don't tell this to the publishers... I've been writing this for ages, starting actually from 1988, when my first (and for years, only) short story was published in Tähtivaeltaja. There are even some same characters.)

I also started going through a private eye novel about Joe Novak, who's been in one short story in Isku (and in another one in a forth-coming issue). The novel is called "The Dostoyevsky Reel" and is about the last days of Hollywood's B-film system and the drive-in movies and stuff like that. It's very short, only about 35 000 words, and should make a good Ace Double. Who would write the other half?

I wrote "The Dostoyevsky Reel" in 1999, when my daughter Ottilia was born. I read it last Christmas and thought it worked quite well, but I don't know if the Finnish publishers would be interested in it, since it's situated in the US in the late fifties. There are of course the vanity presses, but I've come to a conclusion that I could even make some money out of it, if I made some 100-150 copies with my own money and sell them under the counter, since I don't think the Finnish vanity presses would be able to sell more copies. And I would certainly know what the book should look like!

There's just that the English title is much more better than the translated one. ("Kela Dostojevskia"? "Dostojevski-rulla"? "Raina ja rangaistus"? Any suggestions for the Finnish title? Anyone?)